(847): dude, osama threatened the US again
(1-847): dude. i slept with your sister last night
(847): what?
(1-847) I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news

best ever

 

:rofl: good shit

 

(813): I'm fucking your sister right now.
(1-813): You motherfucker
(813): She's next.

 

(+44): if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
(+44): keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction

 

(323): You got in a fight last night?
(818): Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
(323): Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?



:rofl: drunk people

 

(720): i bet jesus would rush if he went to USC

 

(330): and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"

lol

 

Jesus would also be a douchebag if he went to USC :fawk:

 

Nice one Jesse h:
(202): therell be strippers and coke right?
(703): no strippers. just coke.
(202): i hate this fuckin recession

 

this site is soooooo much win