SOme shit my parents argue about constantly....
It's my first day.
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 13,635
Likes: 0
From: Grafton, WI.
Originally posted by (98)2DrAV6
Yea no kidding man ! My dad tries to tell him to man up, but my mom never says anything. You see, I have to admit that my brother is a mommas boy, and my mom doesnt realize that. My mom never said anything to him like "You need to hurry up and move out" or anything like that. My mom sounds like shed be perfectly happy if my brother just lived at home and not even have a job, but just be at home.
Yea no kidding man ! My dad tries to tell him to man up, but my mom never says anything. You see, I have to admit that my brother is a mommas boy, and my mom doesnt realize that. My mom never said anything to him like "You need to hurry up and move out" or anything like that. My mom sounds like shed be perfectly happy if my brother just lived at home and not even have a job, but just be at home.
This too shall pass..
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 247
Likes: 0
From: DC/VA/MD/NY/OH
Not always but sometimes you have to step up.
Now I am not saying to do this exactly but think about it. When they fight tell them to stop or ask them to tone it down because you can't take it. They might think about respecting you. I am unclear on your age, but I remember when I was younger(about 11) I would drop what I was doing and run away from them fighting because it hurt me to hear my (both biological) parents screaming at each other for no reason. When my dad and my step mom would argue and I was 18 plus, I tell them to stop (not so matter of fact, and usually I interject my dad, but he he would listen and stop argueing).
Maybe even consider telling them how you feel about it all. Talk to your half-brother too. It sounds liek he really needs support. And while he is 34, we all need a little help. And I agree it sounds like he is taking the "home comforts" a bit much for granted. But (as I imagine) your mom doesn't want him to go because parents like to have their kids around.
I was in a similar situation as your half-brother though (although i was 18). My mom loved having me there, but my step-dad was very "you-make-enough-to-move-out-on-your-own-so-go-be-a-man-and-live-by-your-own-rules". It was a good push, although a different matter in the end because my mom voiced that she thought it would be a good idea too. Everyone has their solid side of the story, but your dad has solid points. A little stay in the low points is understandable, but 3 yrs? He needs to step up to the plate and try.
If you lay idle while they fight it may continue. You can speak up and get what you feel off your chest to the family, or let it play out and stand idel while they possibly fall apart around you. It may not solve anything, but I think it would make you feel better.
Sorry that was bit long, but I know how you feel and I can imagine how your mom, dad, and bro feel too.
Now I am not saying to do this exactly but think about it. When they fight tell them to stop or ask them to tone it down because you can't take it. They might think about respecting you. I am unclear on your age, but I remember when I was younger(about 11) I would drop what I was doing and run away from them fighting because it hurt me to hear my (both biological) parents screaming at each other for no reason. When my dad and my step mom would argue and I was 18 plus, I tell them to stop (not so matter of fact, and usually I interject my dad, but he he would listen and stop argueing).
Maybe even consider telling them how you feel about it all. Talk to your half-brother too. It sounds liek he really needs support. And while he is 34, we all need a little help. And I agree it sounds like he is taking the "home comforts" a bit much for granted. But (as I imagine) your mom doesn't want him to go because parents like to have their kids around.
I was in a similar situation as your half-brother though (although i was 18). My mom loved having me there, but my step-dad was very "you-make-enough-to-move-out-on-your-own-so-go-be-a-man-and-live-by-your-own-rules". It was a good push, although a different matter in the end because my mom voiced that she thought it would be a good idea too. Everyone has their solid side of the story, but your dad has solid points. A little stay in the low points is understandable, but 3 yrs? He needs to step up to the plate and try.
If you lay idle while they fight it may continue. You can speak up and get what you feel off your chest to the family, or let it play out and stand idel while they possibly fall apart around you. It may not solve anything, but I think it would make you feel better.
Sorry that was bit long, but I know how you feel and I can imagine how your mom, dad, and bro feel too.
cause it's tight!
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 8,044
Likes: 0
From: 916
I agree w/above post, except I think you should talk to each person one on one BEFORE the argument happens. Talk to dad, let him know how you feel when they start fighting, mom too. Maybe if mom hears dads opinion from someone other than dad, it may register and she may realize how passive she's being. I'm all for helping out when tough times hit, but damn, 3 years? That's just being lazy if you ask me. Have you ever talked to your brother about this? What's he got to say for himself? Does he care about the relationship between your father and his mother? Does he realize the effects his lack of responsibility is having on thier relationship?