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Welp, I'm angry.

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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 04:23 PM
  #1  
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Default Welp, I'm angry.

I was just informed that NOBODY reads cover letters anymore. This coming from recruiters, senior recruiters, upper management in technology, finance, etc. Which is how it should be. I believe the resume should be able to sell itself.

Seeing as I have probably written hundreds of cover letters in the past six months, I figure it's time I should have some fun with it. If you're not going to read it, then I'm just gonna start trolling.

I just submitted this one a little while ago:

Dear Employer,

As a professional with over four years experience as a musician, firefighter, and part-time astronaut, I believe my skills are well suited for the Production Coordinator position.

After a year away from the studio, Omation called me back in 2007 to return to the Barnyard franchise as the Layout Coordinator. I am especially skilled at managing people, progress tracking, schedules, shot and asset information, budgets, and telephone/email correspondence with multiple departments and other such parties. My efforts have helped make Back At The Barnyard a Daytime Emmy-winning show.

Attached is my resume, which is located on the underside of a circus magician's hat, next to the purple rabbits. I am excited about discussing possible future employment opportunities, and hope to hear back soon, hopefully over some fine Belgian Waffles and hot cocoa.

Kisses,

Dominic del Castillo


And the attached one right before that.


If I don't get the jobs that I applied for, I can still pursue my lifelong dream of working at BJ's. Then i can really tell people I work for BJ's.
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 04:26 PM
  #2  
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My friend works in IT at BJs corporate office h:
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 04:37 PM
  #3  
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I still read cover letters.
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 07:37 PM
  #4  
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I was callend in for my cover letter.
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 07:38 PM
  #5  
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Default

i jsut submit cover letters sometimes.
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 08:56 PM
  #6  
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will be writing a cover letter to submit to some ems agencys
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 09:34 PM
  #7  
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kisses for BJ's
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Old Aug 19, 2010 | 10:50 PM
  #8  
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Boss: what the ____, is this guy serious?

:closeup: Boss: ...corn dogs and soda huh?

:naughty: Boss: f*ck it, thug lyfe!

Boss: Hello Mr. del Castillo, I was impressed with your cover letter and resume. I'd like to meet for lunch to discuss your future here at XXX, I know a good place at the mall we can eat.
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Old Aug 20, 2010 | 12:13 AM
  #9  
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Default

Originally Posted by b00gers
I still read cover letters.
Same here, or I'll at least skim through them. If I ran across cover letters like yours, I'd laugh but probably not call.
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Old Aug 20, 2010 | 04:29 AM
  #10  
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Default

they might not read them right away, but they might after they look at your resume. in which case they will read that and move on to the next.
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