Okay, so I was hanging out with this girl earlier this year and she started giving me vibes. So, in an effort to be up front and to not lead her on, I told her "I just got out of a relationship and I am not looking for anything other than a friend and maybe an occasional hook up. So, she starts going off on how she just ended a relationship like that and wanted to think about it. I really didn't pay any mind to it, would hang out with her occasionally, etc.

So last night she is talking to me about it and how she doesnt feel comfortable doing it. I tell her I understand and that is fine with me. She thought I was going to hate her and I told her absolutely not. Well, instead of letting the topic die, she keeps hanging onto it. She is like, it is weird when you invite me over at 12 or 1 AM. I told her look, I am usually unable to sleep and bored at that time, and if I invite you over, its just to hang out. She goes on and on, till she said something along the lines of:

If something were to happen I am not "strong enough" to stop you from "doing anything" if I am not feeling comfortable

Basically she said I would commit an act that is absolutely horrid in nature and would never think about it. So I told her I was mad and that I didn't really want to speak to her. I mean, if this is a guy you have been hanging out with for a while, you have to be able to tell SOMETHING about their character. So anyway, I go to bed and she IMs me with some ish about how she has trust issues with guys and her reasons, etc etc. I honestly do not feel like dealing with this.

So, how do I tell her to get lost, with out making her unable to trust guys even more?

 

tell her she turned you :ghey:

it works, ask Rich.

 

the bitch probably really does want it and she's just a fuckin psycho
just tell her to **** off if after all these months of hanging out with you that she still can't trust you
i hate stupid ass girl drama like this shit it's gay

 

Yeah, I seriously have nothing to gain/lose by being/not being her friend. I have friends.

 

guys you have been hanging out with for a while do that shit too. its not just complete strangers. unfortuneately i speak from experience. he was a good friend, and i never would have guessed he would ever do that to a girl.

i have huge trust issues with guys, but be honest with her. tell her you dont think yall should hang out for a while because of what she said. if that what she thinks youre capable of, then she doesnt think very highly of you to begin with. just tell her the truth.

 

Yeah, I am going to. I mean when I met her she was a nice person and all but over the past few weeks she has been freaking me out a bit....almost like we are dating

Oh yeah, we never hooked up or anything which is a good thing.

 

Having been there before, I would say she wants to feel like you took advantage of her. Like she isn't responisble for what is happening. DON'T DO IT! It will come back to bite you in the but.
Even though I got the "don't you find me attractive" drama later, I was very glad for morals saving me from the other stuff.

 

get out now while you're still a free man.

 

Yeah, good point. Last thing I need are accusations of things happening...you know? I actually had my brothers go to a date rape speaker that was hosted by one of the Sororities...you really learn a lot and how some situations that you are in can be very very bad. Definitely opened my eyes.

 

She clearly has her own issues to deal with. It sounds to me like her perception of men has been distorted due to some pretty traumatic stuff. I feel sorry for her.
I say tell her frankly and without "passing judgement" how that comment made you feel, and that if she wants to have any form of relationship with you, friend or otherwise, then there's got to be some degree of trust.

But until she internalizes that, just let her be.