Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result -all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.

Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the
newest monkey.

After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.

Why not?

Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been done around here.

And that, my friend, is how company policy begins.:doh::doh:

 

:lmfao: That is so god damn true!!!

 

repost

but eh, its true.

 

Great post! :thumbup: :lmfao: h:

 

speaking of company...here's a good one.

Dear Staff,
> It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If
> we see you wearing Prada sneakers & carrying a Gucci bag we assume you are
> doing well financially and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress
> poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy
> nicer clothes and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress
> in-between, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not
> need a raise. PERSONAL DAYS: Each employee will receive 104 personal days
> a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday. LUNCH BREAK: Skinny people get
> 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more so that they can look
> healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced
> meal to maintain their average figure. Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch,
> because that's all the time needed to drink a SlimFast and take a diet
> pill. SICK DAYS: We will no longer accept a doctor statement as proof of
> sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to
> work. RESTROOM USE: Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom.
> There is now a strict 3-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of
> three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract,
> the stall door will open and a picture will be taken. After your second
> offence, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under
> the "Chronic Offenders" category. SURGERY: As long as you are an employee
> here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything.
> We hired you intact. To have something removed constitutes a breach of
> employment. Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to
> provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions,
> comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations,
> insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplation, consternation and
> input should be directed elsewhere. Have a nice week! MANAGEMENT

 

:repost:

i think you posted it before even. and i know IVE posted.

 

very good thread. Never read those b4. Thanks OLDMAN and lil_1_2002

 

:chuckles:
That sucks if its true.

 

:rofl: