John and his roommate Mary invited John's mother over for dinner. The mother had long been suspicious that the two were more than roomates, but John assured her they were just friends. About a week later, Mary told John that a silver gravy ladle had been missing since his mother's visit.

He wrote his mother this e-mail: I'm not saying that you "did" or "did not" take the gravy ladle from my house, but the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

His mother replied: I'm not saying that you "do" or "do not" sleep with Mary, but the fact remains that if she were sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.

:rofl: owned!