today (10.11.03) would've been my daughter's 13th birthday.
from the "confession thread" w/ my previos id
Originally posted by adslinstaller
I've only shared this with one other person in my life...not a single member of my family (who I'm not really close to anyway)
1) about 7 years ago I had an ex that had a daughter that died young & she took her own life.
2) had info from one of her relatives that the daughter was mine & she never told me, but not 100% sure.
3) got REALLY depressed considering #2. I took my revolver, put 1 bullet in the chamber, spun the barrel, put it in my mouth & pulled the trigger.......TWICE!!!!
I've never thought that much about it since that & have never even got to a point where #3 would even be a consideration again. So I guees you could say I'm much better now!!:thumbup:
The one thing I learned is there is ABSOLUTELY no since living in the past. The past is just that...you can't change it. Learn from it & grow or you are destined to repeat your mistakes.
:climbing down from my soapbox now:
think i'll go for a ride on the bike to clear my head. might ride to her grave & chill w/ her for awile. :sad: the funny thing is i never even met her & even knew of her existence till after she was gone.
never thought i wanted kids at all, but now that i'm gettin older that's all i really want.
thanks for lettin me vent
btw: don't worry about me doing what i did previously in the above post...i'm much more rational now & realize that solves NOTHING!!!!