Props to BrianB for the find:

Real meaning of words in women's personal ads.
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Strong woman - Bitch with a severe case of self entitlement.


Classy - Bitchy 45 year old real estate agent type.


Seeking gentleman - Looking for rich guy who isn't interested in sex.


World traveler - would love to go to Europe as long as you're buying.


Intelligent - She isn't but thinks she is, and you'd better entertain her.


Rubenesque - Fat


Sarcastic - Bought into the whole Gen X irony thing and is really a miserable bore to hang out with.


Make me laugh - You're expected to be highly entertaining right away.


Sick of bar scene - She doesn't get hit on at bars due to one or more physical flaws.


Friends first - Reformed slut


Tired of games/jerks - I ****ed and sucked my way through fifteen counties, but now I want a docile schmuck to pay my bills and not pester me for sex.


Shapely - Fat


BBW - Grossly, morbidly obese (Bring Burgers With)


Must like kids - I want a putz who will break his ass paying for another man's cast off progeny.


Loves the Outdoors - Closet Lesbo


Snuggling and Warm Fires - No Sex


Enjoys Traveling - You're paying, right?


Fun Loving - ****ed 100 guys


Meaningful Relationship - Slavery


Nurturing - Smothering


Sassy - Insufferable by the third date.


Bubbly - All ****in happy all the damn time to the point of annoying.


No games! - I won't put up with your games, but I will gladly infuriate you with mine.


Eccentric or quirky - Psycho...


Financially Secure - You should own about 200,000 shares of MSFT.