While I was "flying" down the road yesterday (40 mph over the limit), I passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side laying in wait..

The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"

To which I replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.

The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?"

"Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in I work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."

"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?"

To which I politely replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him
behind a bridge.."

Traffic Ticket: $195.00
Court Costs: $145.00
The Look on that Cop's Face: PRICELESS


:chuckles:

 

AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

im using it! i'll be postign from jail

 

That's good! :lmfao:

 

That is NICE!! :lmfao:

 

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

that was instant laughter in a very quite library......

geez, that's classic

 

i found that calling a cop an asshole because he pulled you over for going 40 over the limit just not funny h:

:doh: i need morning humor.

 

:lmao: Good one!