Dear Dipshit,

**** off

-Your Superior

 

Dear Jess/the staff at 99civic_love headquarters,

Yes she may. Provided Derek gets turn down for all future applications with 99civic_love headquarters or anything else related.


:rick:

 

Dear Deek,
We will keep you informed as to whether positions will be available. We have no records of any "nightshade" or such to disregard. Thank you for your time.

-the staff


Dear Rick,

The following arrangements can be arranged, Jess has approved them and is ver excited. She says she will be there as soon as she can afford plane tickets, but since she is very poor at the moment, that might take some time.

Thank You-
the staff

 

Dear mods,

i wish to be reinstated. Han will be happy as I when I ban all the n00bs

 

Dear Rick,

thanks for the kind letter. oh wait, thats fat Derek. I own you and your gf, and will change your will to the following

"I hereby bequeth my estate, and the estate of my "life partner" Mrs. Rick, to Derek, the skinny one, with the large wang"

 

Dear Morpheus,

I have informed the Mossad(Israeli Secret Service) of your anti-Israel leanings. An agent, by the name of Yossi Goldberg, will appear at your house to give you a slow, painfully death.

Sincerly,

Derek,

President and CEO

Zionist World Council Of Elders.

(lets see if you catch the humor in that)

 

I'm not really up on politics that much.

 

Dear Morpheus,

Go fit your 1mm appendage inside the tail pipe of your DX Accord, and close your eyes, pretending you are making sweet love to your mother.

You have as much chance of scoring as you do becoming a mod.

Sincerely,

Another Member Of HAN Who Thinks You Suck A Fat Cock.

 

you know enough to think my dear country is a "mistake"

 

Dear other Derek,

Morpheus2 appears to have a position, in the packing department, of Fudge Industries. You will be personally working with him.