my ex boyfriend is outside in my yard. i cannot leave my house, or even venture downstairs.





he needs to go away, or else my temptations will give in and i will do him some serious bodily harm.

 

call the police or turn on the sprinkler

 

bad bodily harm?
if so hire some goons

 

shoo him away

 

if i'm close enough to shoo him away, i'm close enough to break his nose. i will probably pick the latter.

 

go take a poop on your front lawn right in front of him and ask if he has any toilet paper. he prolly won't like you after that.

 

got any mad dogs around u can release?

 

yea call the police, and say its rape. $$$$

 

he's underneath my window, and i can't do anything about it, he's here to help my friend work on the yard. so my mom seizes the opportunity to talk to him (of course, not about me, but what she wants to do with the landscaping)


can't he just die and go away???????

 

In your yard? Demand he leave. Private property.

edit: oh... he's not there to see you. nevermind