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-   -   Why I'm divorced... (https://www.honda-acura.net/forums/the-basement/635386-why-im-divorced.html)

yellowbastard Sep 24, 2010 09:50 AM

Why I'm divorced...
 
Why I'm divorced.........

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking
up on that morning..

I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
'Happy Birthday!',
and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone
' Happy Birthday.'

I thought....

Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low
and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
'Good Morning Boss,
and by the way
Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better
that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock ,
when Jane knocked on my door
and said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me..'
I said, 'Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go !'

We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office,
Jane said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office,
Do We ?'

I responded,
'I guess not.
What do you have in mind ?'
She said,
'Let's drop by my apartment,
it's just around the corner..'

After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,

' Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed
by my wife,
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing 'Happy Birthday'.


And I just sat there....

On the couch....

Naked...

canada Sep 24, 2010 09:54 AM

Wife should have said Happy Birthday and none of it would have happened. It's her fault. It always is...

shirley Sep 24, 2010 09:55 AM

i think they found that joke inscribed in the pyramids it's so old :oh:

danni*j Sep 24, 2010 10:08 AM

Still thought it was a good story

NOPD Sep 24, 2010 10:11 AM

old

DarkStarr Sep 24, 2010 12:45 PM

lulz were had

reech-around Sep 24, 2010 12:46 PM

hahahahhaa

R_Squared Sep 24, 2010 01:24 PM

oooold...still funny though

CRAIGHIMSELF Sep 24, 2010 01:47 PM

I became slightly eroused.

thomas Sep 24, 2010 01:49 PM


Originally Posted by craighimself (Post 4638938)
i became slightly eroused.

+1


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