What generation is your Accord? Prior to the 6th gens (98+) all Accords shift 'rough' Its normal, and I tend to prefer the harder shifts. Honda designed for it to give the car more of a 'sporty' feel, similar to the feel of a manual. Unfortunately, too many people complained and Honda went to what I call 'pillow' automatics. As for the vibrating, only time my engine vibrates is when the AC compressor kicks on when car is at idle. Other than that, very smooth. Sorry to hear you are having these problems...I'm on my second Accord, and my family swears by them(so Ive pretty much grown up with them as well) and have always known them to be low maintenance. They are among the only cars I can think of that will go 200,000 miles on nothing more than regular routine maintenance.