Take out your wife beater... spill some beer on it, also add salsa and queso stains to taste. Let dry before wearing.

I suggest either ancient faded sweatpants with holes in them (if you're watching at home), or to dress up for a night on the town, that pair of jeans with holes in knees and butt. Paint, tar, or other construction stains are a must, add them yourself if need be.

24 pack of keystone or coors light, couple packs of camels, and you're good to go.

If you go to Hooters, make sure to take that trashy slut you know with big bleached blonde 80s hair and saggy tits.