If you go to family reunions to meet women...you might be a redneck.

If your first pet was a chicken...*

If you've ever mowed your lawn and found a car...*

If you've ever made change in the offering plate...*

If your outdoor furniture used to be your livingroom furniture...*

If you've ever been accused of lying through your tooth...*

If your dog and your wallet are both on a chain...*

If you thing the 'nutcracker' is something you did of the highdive...*

(just a few off the top of my head this morning )