When my Dad died 2 and a half years ago, i was left X amount of dollars. It's gone. What do i have to show for it? Well, I paid off my car and paid for my wheels, lip kit and other things for it. Umm...yea. that's about all. The rest of it, I lived off of and bought some clothes, took my friends out a lot..i was generous. Now, i have less than $50 in my checking account and as i type this, have $300 in bills on my desk. My cable is going to be shut off and my health insurance is going to be canceled. My Life insurance is 2 months behind, and my credit is already ruined because of late credit card bills.

When i think about the money that my dad left me and how i completely blew it all instead of saving it for a house, like he wanted...it makes me sick. Then when i think about how ive been searching for a job in my field for 7 months now, and havent gotten ANYTHING, it makes me want to crawl in a hole and die.

It's no one's fault but my own. Yes, i LOVE nice things and new things..there's not a damn thing wrong with wanting to have nice clothes, a nice car, nice tangable things. I just wish i wouldve been a little more responsible with that money, not because i'm broke now, but because i feel like i let my dad down.

Oh well. It's only money, right? If i died tomorrow, what good would it do me? May as well enjoy life now...because you never know.