you sound a lot like me about 4 years ago. i was way out of shape (the fattest i've ever been), i wanted to drop out of college, and i was having insecurity issues with my gf at the time. i couldnt trust her either, even though she NEVER did anything to question my judgement. it was all in my head. eventually i realized that i didnt really love her.

i think you "controlled" her because of your insecurity. perhaps you felt that if she lived the way you wanted her to, she wouldnt stray away or something. you'll learn that if you really love someone, you wont have feelings of jealousy, distrust, or insecurity. and most importantly, get that confidence up...you gotta love yourself before loving someone else.