I too want 2002-2003 to just go away. Horrible for me too. Not nearly as horrible for you, I can't imagine how you and your family feel right now.

Cancer is horrible. I've watched my friend's mom go through treatment for the past 7 years on and off--she's had it her whole life. I couldn't imagine her dying, she's like a second mother to me. It's scary, but anybody in that situation is made a strong person--even if it's at the cost of their life. Things happen that aren't explained and death is the worst of them. He'll always be there, don't worry. Take care of your mom and yourself. You're going to be ok. Just don't lose hope. If you need anything let me know. HAN and Autopia is here for you.