Spec R

The gf of almost 12 years and I have decided NOT to have kids. Naturally, everyone is shocked and has given us the following responses:

-You'll change your minds.
-You would make great parents.
-You won't have a continuing legacy.
-No one will take of you when you get old.

Those are not enough to sway us, especially:

-when our parents are always badgering us to save more money. I cant think of a bigger way to save more money than NOT to have children.
-Me and Gf have very little in terms of support system. Her parents aren't in the greatest of health, my parents are busy taking care of my brother's kids and I don't like the toll its taking on them. Our siblings barely have enough time for their own kids, let alone someone else's.
-I would think that having children is a desire/dream more than a necessity to adulthood. It was a dream/desire to have a turbo integra or a lancer evo at some point in my life. I would hope that a potential parent would have the same desire as I did for having a turbo integra/evo but that's not us.
-We've seen what having children has done to our closest friends and family. Everyone seems rather defeated/deflated/different. Some have flat out said they regret having children.

I can go on and on, but just wanted to see what you guys thought.

RicoD

Better for you to not have kids and be happy than have a child and be miserable and have that translate to the child I say....

puffy

I always thought I would be ultimate bachelor without a kid to have to worry about or support financially. When I had my daughter my whole mindset changed. When he/she looks you in the eyes and tells you they love you, I don't give a f#ck how much you hate kids or don't want to have them , everything changes. Plus who wants to die alone without anyone continuing on.?We were put on this earth to reproduce. Oh yeah think about this.....You would not be here if your parents decided not to have kids.

white_n_slow

I'm with you. I'm fixed, no biokids are in the cards for me. But I do have a step kiddo that I love and support financially h:

For me the reasons were a little different:

- World is going to hell in a handbasket, and I view overpopulation as one of the driving factors
-Bad genes, high likelihood of heart defect and some mental issues
-Why make more babies when there are millions of children in the world already needing parents. If I decided I really wanted kids in my life, I would adopt
-Having a now near-20 daughter, my wife wasn't really interested in starting over at 0 and being in full-on mom mode for 40 years straight.

Funny thing though, when I got fixed, nobody in my family said shit. I guess it helps that my brother has two little girls, so they already have their grandkid fix.

fathergoat

those are some selfish reasons to have kids. unfortunately I see a lot of people using their kids for selfish reasons.

LABARINTH

I love having kids. Kids are awesome. But they are not for everyone. I completely agree that if you don't want kids you shouldn't have them. Enjoy your surplus income and free time :goodjob:

NOPD

Agree wholeheartedly.

NOPD

Don't agree and this is coming from me who loves my kid and want to have more.

Tark

My wife is 8 months pregnant... i never thought I would have kids but I am excited as fuck. I mean at first... meh baby is really a eating shitting pillow from what I understand. But I can't wait to play with her, revive some of that Xmas magic, be a dorky dad, watch harry potter, go to Disney land with her, travel with her. these are the things that will bring me pleasure in life.

I was lucky enough to live the single life plenty enough, the coupled life plenty enough, now it's time for parenthood until she is old enough to be independent.

It will be a hell of a ride but I am really looking forward to it.

Tark

I think someone can accuse you of being selfish if one reason you don't want children is for the financial saving. Unless of course you are in no position to pay for the needs of the child... like if you are on welfare or homeless.